What I Can Be

[Esstee616]

My first post in this section, been writin lyrics seriously for the past 2 month or so. Wrote this the other day Feeback greatly appreciated! Thanks.

I fathom what i can be if i arrive on these streets
Like a tyrant of speech, my mindset is bleak but the lyrics are deep
Methaphors so calculated that they can slit your thoughts in your sleep
My determination isnt doubted, an imagination that becomes my occupation when its shouted
Flowing better than water through a fountain
These thoughts are on course to echo their way from my vocal chords to the mountains
A lyrical direction, aiming high for these hills of perfection
Listen closely and you'll see the satirical miracle that are my words when you dissect em.

[Esstee616]

Feedback please??

[Just Silver]

Very good first piece guy, at first the structure looked strange then i re-read it and reformed my opinion

a little short but i assume it was on purpose because u werent sure of feed maybe? idk thats why i make mine short

overall real nice for a first would be glad to see some more stuff guy

[Esstee616]

Thanks alot man, appreciate it! I'll keep em comin. Yeah i know its short but i wasnt sure what people would think coz i'm kinda new to this so thought i'd just give a little piece.