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been a long ass time

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been a long ass time

Postby stevethetruth » Feb 25th, '09, 17:08

not as good as my old stuff but here goes

sitting here so tired and weak with no sleep
thoughts of defeat conceived and they go deep
ready to quit so tired of stressing life
head in splits admiring my death in sight
what would people think when that shit goes down
to read peoples minds what I'd give to now
hear exactly what words they are thinking
do they know that I'm stuck here sinking
reminiscing all the great, that's my past
smashed full on memories got me thinking glass
so gentle steadily handle or I'll shatter fast
bit and pieces exactly where the heart is at
can't sink no lower than this life's a bitch
why follow the rest and strive for bliss
life's your bitch how retarded is this
i'm sick of it just end mine quick
http://www.myspace.com/stevethetruth <-- my myspace add me!!
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Re: been a long ass time

Postby neversnooze » Feb 26th, '09, 02:50

this was a satisfactory job :y: you flowed well and your structure is well. there was nothing eye catching but it had a smooth flow and meaning about your life

8/10 :wave:
Sometimes I stay up so late that I have my morning coffee before I go to bed
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Re: been a long ass time

Postby Slim Zaddy » Feb 26th, '09, 08:45

it's good i liked it ,, as said structure and flow are great ,, beside that ,, it has emotions .. gd job here :y:
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z_em = Slim Zaddy = Zaid AQ which is my real name
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Re: been a long ass time

Postby stevethetruth » Feb 26th, '09, 13:33

thanks alot for the feedback guys :happy: i knew it would be basic just tried to add meaning to it at least lol

thanks for checking it out :y: :D
http://www.myspace.com/stevethetruth <-- my myspace add me!!
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