"The Bitch"

[FAME]

I’m simply just ahead./ Your old like dated bread.
Verbal abuse is what you’ll dread./ Your heart punctured like a water bed.
Easy for men to spread your legs like butter on plain grain
Your easy-to-obtain./ Deadly-like-cocaine./ Ugly-like-mud stains.
Your inhumane in your stripper like attitude./ Your off the latitude.
I’m losing my gratitude to being better than you.

Ready-to-cry./ Ugly-blonde-dyed./ Having-no-pride./
It’s the end of your stride no more getting by.
Having guys all over your supply./ Their hands on your thigh.
You got no ally./ Your ready to cry.
Your ass like one big bull’s eye./ You can try.
I’m still the high my rhymes making you need
Like you need your stash of weed.
Listen bitch cause your only good to breed.

I wanted to pratice some multis, which I know barely anything about but have been trying to read up on them. Feedback on how to do them better would be much loved . I wanted to try and place them in a diss, so I wrote 2 different parts, to which a gal at my school who deserves to be dissed.

[bullet_boy46]

punctured like a water bed was a great line can ya check mine out? its calle tick tock

[FAME]

punctured like a water bed was a great line can ya check mine out? its calle tick tock

Check it out, thanks for the feedback, can anyone else feedback me on multis, and maybe explain them more to me? Thanks.

[J Roc]

can anyone else feedback me on multis, and maybe explain them more to me? Thanks.

Hah Forreal i never saw any multie's ... Theyr'e Not that hard to do, just rhyme Multiple word's in a row.. like :

J roc, Pay Off, Thank God, Tank Top, Bank Rob,

J, Pay, Thank, Tank, And Bank All Rhyme.. So Does The Second Words, Which Are "Roc, Off, God, Top, Rob"

They gotta be in the same format, So in the multiple rhyme the words can't switch up... They gotta be in the same order.

i dunno i can't explain things good,, i Tried tho... Nice piece just work on ya multies.

[FAME]

can anyone else feedback me on multis, and maybe explain them more to me? Thanks.

Hah Forreal i never saw any multie's ... Theyr'e Not that hard to do, just rhyme Multiple word's in a row.. like :

J roc, Pay Off, Thank God, Tank Top, Bank Rob,

J, Pay, Thank, Tank, And Bank All Rhyme.. So Does The Second Words, Which Are "Roc, Off, God, Top, Rob"

They gotta be in the same format, So in the multiple rhyme the words can't switch up... They gotta be in the same order.

i dunno i can't explain things good,, i Tried tho... Nice piece just work on ya multies.

Thanks, I still kinda don't get it though. I understand now words rhyming in a row, but I don't understand the same format deal/same order. But thanks for trying bro.

[Relapse.LP]

I'm not sure exactly what you're asking to be explained, but what you're utilizing in your verse above are "internal" rhymes, not "multi" rhymes as much.

Both are equally important in determining a rapper's complexity with his raps, but are quite different.

Heavy usage of internal rhyming is like:

I'll shoot you dead with a lead bullet in your head while you're in bed in your little shed/
You could have fled when I said you'd be dead and spared your bed sheets from being red/

It's whack and such, but it's obvious I repeated the sound "-ed" many times within that bar. That's internal rhyming: using the same sound over and over in ONE single line or several lines.

Usage of multi-rhyming WITHOUT internal rhyming is like:

This rhyme is so dope so you're afraid to battle me/
I'll tie you up like how I did when I got laid by Natalie/

It's also really whack, but I rhymed more than one syllable at the end. The "-aid" sound in afraid and laid rhyme and "battle me" and "Natalie" rhyme 3 syllables. The little words like "to" and "by" and "and" and "the" are not extremely important to add into your multis, but do help a little. I tend to ignore rhyming little words unless I really want to. So to review: multi rhyming is the rhyming of more than one syllable in a certain phrase.

To combine both multies and internals is the most effective...

Usage of BOTH styles of rhyming:

To drop classic rhymes take a tad-bit of mind and you need to make your gat-spit fine/
Like when a fat-bitch whines during the Jurassic times you need to cover her mouth with elastic binds/

It makes no sense at all, but the sound "-at-it-ine" is repeated a lot through the span of two lines. So that's how you combine both styles.

Other styles of lyrical complexity are alliteration, wordplay, metaphors, and many others. For an example of alliteration, listen to "If I Die 2Nite" by 2Pac and lots of rappers have wordplay and metaphors, so that's easy to find.

Note: There's a large difference between WRITTEN rhymes and SPITTED rhymes. When you spit rhymes you could possibly rhyme pulsing with sultan, but most people won't acknowledge or even realize that those two rhyme if you don't actually say it. That's what sucks about texting rhymes. And it's much harder to spit rhymes, so if you can write and not spit, it's useless really.

[FAME]

THANK YOU!

I understand now Thanks sooo much

[Relapse.LP]

No problem.