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Pratice? (HELP!)

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Pratice? (HELP!)

Postby FAME » Nov 10th, '09, 05:43

Get a full blown consent, for what’s been meant
As I lay my head to rest, and say fuck every pest
The press takes a guess, but they are just something less
I know I’m the best, and I school all the rest
No need to test me, I’ll verbally dissect thee
Murdering like bees, because I sting like Jet Li
Knock your ass, while your smoking grass
Steal your cash, and then dash
Run straight past, your fat ass, and then crash
Forgot how they lash out, and start to bounce doubt
Making mind games, ding like guitar strings
I’m the bar see, no need for stars G
Five already set, no place to bet on the best
Check my face, there is no way I’m kidding ace
Lace up a pair of boots, in kick you in your fucking face.
Step into the ring, and clothesline you into a new phase
Change, rearranged, I’ll leave you manned
Laying on the bathroom floor, blood smeared on the drawer
Razor blades laid, with your memory deadly crazed
Insane? Maybe late, give him a break
Grandmother died the day I was born, ain’t that great?
I’m just a curse, the worst, worth nothing but hurt
Can’t be contained, gonna need to examine my DNA
It will be like Resident Evil, but you can’t complete the game.


I'm still trying to get multis down, did I do any in this? :(
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FAME
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Re: Pratice? (HELP!)

Postby Yah-hah » Nov 10th, '09, 05:49

Hey man. I can see your kinda gettin it. Was kinda basic but not terrible. It was good just gotta practice and in doing that you'll start getting the hang of it. I started like this piece using simpler rhymes and just putting two together. The more you practice the easier it will come to you.
"No need to test me, I’ll verbally dissect thee
Murdering like bees, because I sting like Jet Li"
Take this line for example. You had test me, dissect thee, and Jet li which rhyme great. But the murdering like bees part is a bit off. It rhymes but just one syllable. You did that a few times but you can see your workin on it. Just keep practicing and you'll get the hang of it man. Good work
Image

"Red hand I use to reach deep in my dark quiver,
Arrow so big the fuckin bones in ya arm splinter
Fuckin crazy I'll stick my hand throgh ya hearts center,
With sharp scissors the words Native Pride gets carved in her,
"-Yah-hah

Trimss wrote:Your dog is cute, your tattoo fucking rocks, you can fight and your baby have a big dick.
Your life is cool bro lol :y:


Nundea Mekeze comin soon May 4th
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Yah-hah
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Location: El Dorado, Kansas USA
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Re: Pratice? (HELP!)

Postby FAME » Nov 10th, '09, 05:52

Yah-hah wrote:Hey man. I can see your kinda gettin it. Was kinda basic but not terrible. It was good just gotta practice and in doing that you'll start getting the hang of it. I started like this piece using simpler rhymes and just putting two together. The more you practice the easier it will come to you.
"No need to test me, I’ll verbally dissect thee
Murdering like bees, because I sting like Jet Li"
Take this line for example. You had test me, dissect thee, and Jet li which rhyme great. But the murdering like bees part is a bit off. It rhymes but just one syllable. You did that a few times but you can see your workin on it. Just keep practicing and you'll get the hang of it man. Good work


Thank you so much! Yeah I'm still trying to learn, but thank you so much for the help. I feel like I now understand alot better what mulitis are, now to pratice, pratice, pratice... :shifty:
:flower:
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FAME
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Posts: 1087
Joined: Sep 19th, '09, 14:52
Gender: Female

Re: Pratice? (HELP!)

Postby Yah-hah » Nov 10th, '09, 05:57

No problem man anytime you need help or watever just message me and I'll be happy to help you out man :y:
Image

"Red hand I use to reach deep in my dark quiver,
Arrow so big the fuckin bones in ya arm splinter
Fuckin crazy I'll stick my hand throgh ya hearts center,
With sharp scissors the words Native Pride gets carved in her,
"-Yah-hah

Trimss wrote:Your dog is cute, your tattoo fucking rocks, you can fight and your baby have a big dick.
Your life is cool bro lol :y:


Nundea Mekeze comin soon May 4th
User avatar
Yah-hah
Renegade
Renegade
 
Posts: 2724
Joined: Jun 7th, '09, 09:25
Location: El Dorado, Kansas USA
Gender: Male


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