The TRshady Forum became read-only in December 2014. The 10 year history will live on, in this archive.
Continue the discussion with the new home for the Eminem and Hip Hop discussion: HipHopShelter.com.

yahoo the way 'n' the answers

Want to share a poem, story or a moving article? Share creative literature text here.

yahoo the way 'n' the answers

Postby bullet_boy46 » Nov 28th, '09, 05:03

i posted this 2 years ago, may 14, 2008 on yahoo answers :flower: what you think?

It's crunch time, having every minute to bunch rhymes
Knocking out mcs with my powerful punch lines
I live in the background, having a discreet life
But I have a sweet life with a background of a streetlight
Being like a mosquito, injecting toxic juices
To leave a mark on people with their exotic bruises
And being strong, I'm here blastin' strong bears
With the fist on the mic and Sampson's long hair
I'm making cold mc go to diabetic mode
They can't get electrified to life even with electric poles
Just making cash flow, exciting like Ali's last blow
While others are boring. It's like watching grass grow
Plus your full or crap cause your organs bleeding through
By the way i sew your butt and kept feeding you
And by seeing your head, your mic device is hesitant
Cause i shot words to your brain like the vice president
You see I'm a gentlemen who's crazy making mental bend
That uses his essential pen to confuse simpletons
Into a spiral, shutting their computer with virals
And blowing up their mind with a cycle of sick pyros
Being an electrifying creator like Thomas Edison
Giving this bass to specimen who eating it like medicine
I'm just mad malicious, sadistic
Blowing up the scene with a vicious ballistic
In the mic, I'm god but I have a horrible side
I can't freestyle, it's needed to have an immortal mind
I just forget, seem fake, can't get the cake
I can't blow it up or even detonate
Having so much breaking points in joints, this is one facture
Then when I hold mics, my hand seem to fracture
That's why I don't want my hand to shake in the air
This is Blake, thinking dumb by scratching flakes in his hair

very choppy
Last edited by bullet_boy46 on Nov 29th, '09, 04:32, edited 4 times in total.
Solace wrote:Oh stop your making me blush :blinking:

Image
User avatar
bullet_boy46
Soldier
Soldier
 
Posts: 1109
Joined: Sep 24th, '09, 19:10
Location: New York, West Brighton

Re: rate this random freestyle 1-10

Postby Just Silver » Nov 28th, '09, 05:11

7.8

Really good a huge improvement from some other stuff to be honest

The beginning is perfect
Should definitely work with this style from now on
Spottin :y:
Image
User avatar
Just Silver
Band Leader
Band Leader
 
Posts: 7791
Joined: Jun 27th, '09, 03:40
Location: East Coast
Gender: Male

Re: rate this random freestyle 1-10

Postby Just Silver » Nov 28th, '09, 05:18

My advice is change up the title to something someone would want to click on more
Like "From Answers"
or "Yahoo Style"

People would be like What is that? and look at it

I sometimes change my titles twice to get feed lol

Not guaranteed though but its better chance.
Last edited by Just Silver on Nov 28th, '09, 05:24, edited 1 time in total.
Image
User avatar
Just Silver
Band Leader
Band Leader
 
Posts: 7791
Joined: Jun 27th, '09, 03:40
Location: East Coast
Gender: Male

Re: rate this random freestyle 1-10

Postby bullet_boy46 » Nov 28th, '09, 05:20

3m1n3m Silver wrote:My advice is change up the title to something someone would want to click on more
Like "From Answers"
or "Yahoo Style"

People would be like What is that? and look at it

I sometimes change my titles twice to get feed lol

lol i might listen to ya :D
Solace wrote:Oh stop your making me blush :blinking:

Image
User avatar
bullet_boy46
Soldier
Soldier
 
Posts: 1109
Joined: Sep 24th, '09, 19:10
Location: New York, West Brighton

Re: yahoo the way 'n' the answers

Postby Emadyville » Nov 28th, '09, 05:42

You got a good person to learn from in solace, I can see he is teaching you well, good drop, rhymes were on point :y:
Menzo wrote:Its cuz you're dope and Daddy Dubs. No one fucks with that


I love you Daren
User avatar
Emadyville
Django
Django
 
Posts: 24833
Joined: Jan 17th, '08, 15:58
Location: Catasauqua PA
Gender: Male

Re: yahoo the way 'n' the answers

Postby Fa-Q » Nov 28th, '09, 07:48

I like that Sampsons long hair line, dope try BB
User avatar
Fa-Q
Pill Popper
Pill Popper
 
Posts: 8404
Joined: Dec 20th, '08, 21:15


Return to Creative Writing



Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users

cron