Second verse explains my schizophrenia and my 2 month stay at a mental hospital.
Third Verse explains how recently I lost most of my very close friends.
This is so my fam at TR can get to know me a little bit better.
Haunting me for flaunting these scars of apologies
no odysseys, when I speak no one is stopping me
dropping these, tracks straight from my own heart
blown sparks from thrown darts stuck in a lone dark
anger rises, my iris despises these lyrical vises
on my decisive schemes and patters, so when I try this
the way they say, my lyrics tone down, I'm not me
when I drop these, my heart makes the beat soggy
help me, I'm trapped within commercialized hip-hop
make that shit stop, flip-flop my switchblade to pop
the cherry of this organization, I'm part of a nation
the nation of creation, no relation to lyrical deflation
inspect, observe, discover, uncover my last supper
one another, I'm a brother, to the messiah of lovers
end up cremated, articulated a sad end, it's fated
already stated, placed in no escape, now I'm hated
rhymes debated, but I will always stay true to me
I grew to these diseases that keeps me ill and free
I awoke in a room, broke the IV's, bloody footprints
veins sliced in silence, swollen arms in red tint
hospital clothes, bloodstained as I flee for my life
my core is light, pumping less blood to keep me alive
inside, I was raped by genetics, energy turned kinetic
as my body ran in full throttle, a mental epidemic
down the hallways, white tiled floor drippin red ink
I can't think, dissociate, in my eyes the light shrinks
multiple screams, I think I'm dreamin' yet it all seems
so fucking real, I can almost feel, the illusionary beams
emotionally drained, feet in pain, shadows creeping
no time for weeping, my life is sinking, pen is seeping
knees on the tiled floor, hunched over, yelling in pain
screaming, ''IS THIS JUST A GAME?'', it's all the same
crying tears, slips onto the floor, the hallway turns sublime
one at a time, my memories all go back in a single line.
I've lost my friends, some family, and a lot of love
sitting here looking above, just guide with ya glove
death and loneliness, and only this, can make me cry
malicious people take my side, only to see me die
stabbed in the back, but asked for my support and care
I could never reject their calls, it's something I wouldn't dare
my friends were my heart, or so I would have thought
cause' when I asked for help, rejection is what they brought
I was sittin' there shocked, praying to god it's wrong
all along, I've been associating with the fuckin' wrong
type of people, I was feeble minded, now I'm stone cold
honed bold, stabbed many times, my heart's home sold
I don't give a fuck anymore, yall drained the good out of me
I understood this as fallacy, now I know it's what should be.
