iv been an asshole since the day i was born/ the doctor went to spank me but i hit him first with my umbillical cord/ the first word that came outta my mouth was fuck/ thats why ill be 33 years old and still driving my big wheels tonka truck/ but really growin up i had a foul mouth/ everytime i cussed id get thrown the fuck out/ they even tried putting soap in my mouth/ i liked so much i did it all the time so i could shit bubbles and make it smell like cherries when it came out/ once i snuck into the band room and cummed all over the instruments before band camp started/ 3 years later those bitches are still wonderin how they got pregnant and why thier kids are retarded/ im a rapper not a comedian/ its been that way since i got on the weed again/ ever since i was baby iv had my hands on drugs/ weed cocaine shrooms e and plusss/ i remember putting them in this little girls drink/ so i could rape her in daycare when we were spose to be asleep/
chorus - im an asshole.................im an asshole................im an asshole..................im an ashole...im an asshole
im an asshole there aint no doubt about it/ tell me a secret ill go on news 9 and shout it/ (ur daughter has aids) hi mrs harper you remember me/ im the one that fucked your daughter last week when u were asleep/ you know everytime i see a homeless person on the street/ i walk over to him with a 20$ bill and only give him a penny with the hand i use to scratch my asscheeks/ now wherever i go ppl point and calll me a bad habit/ is it bcuz i went into the pet store saw a snake and grabbed it/ and placed it in a tank with a new born baby rabbit/ (im sorry) just last week i taught my lil cousin how to cuss/ i told him not to tell but that lil bastard ran upstairs screamin i dont give a fuck/ once i was kicked out of a library bcuz i didnt know how to be quiet/ 5mins later i came back in screamin fire while sprayin my fire hydrant/ and i bet a ton of you stupid fuks didnt even get it/ you spray a fire extinguisher not a hydrant you fuckin idiots/
chorus - im an asshole.................im an asshole................im an asshole..................im an ashole...im an asshole
