A little something

[killmaster56]

Not that great but we all start somewhere... here it is


why the fuck did i let myself get like this
thinking about you only makes me feel like shit
you are just so fucking beautiful
but you sure know how to confuse a fool,
these feelins im feeling are real N heart killin
they be drillin my heart till the part when im done feelin
the way that i feel cause your beggin me still
But i cant get over the thrill of you when you chill
its hard to move on when emotions are so strong
I use to think that i belong, but i was oh so wrong


not done yet adding some more later.

[Solace]

Is this your first piece?

[killmaster56]

yea the first one i actually tryed on. What could i do to make it better?

[MC Anonymous]

yea the first one i actually tryed on. What could i do to make it better?

delete it.

[killmaster56]

ha well atlest your being honest

[Solace]

Welll thats not very nice


Its better than my first try. Keep going at it, my first try i didnt use multies at all, i see that you have. Heres my advice: Go to dictionary.com, go to the word of the day, and each day write them down on a piece of paper (the words and the definitions). Try to learn them, and use them in your raps. It gives you more words to rhyme, allows you to make more complex rhymes & gives you more opportunities for multies

[killmaster56]

thanks for the advice shadymademe i will start doing that.

[Slim Zaddy]

well man ,, dont take it hard on yourself .. we all start like that .. so it's not a big deal .. you hve just to keep practicing and post more over this thread ,, so we can feed you in your writing ,, dont give up or somethin, jus get that motivation nd start to write something hot to surprise us in your next drop .. gd luck man ..