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crossed the line

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crossed the line

Postby gutawafang » Feb 2nd, '09, 05:55

Just some practice. took 15 minutes. i did this in class an hour ago. :happy:

at the sight of threats, I'll ride the shaft
if you bite my neck, i'll fight to death
and i'd like to say that i'm not okay
i said i'll ride away lest I'ma die today
i have a line to cross, a fucking mind is cross
shitty, i am lost, God, give me a sign to toss

so i throw you my middle fingers for you to consider
and they grow on you as they fuck you like Godzilla
why do i feel like this?
why am i still like this? emotionally fucked, i refuse to be like this
but i'm like this, i can't fight this
and forgive me, i might diss, i've never felt high like this

so hi, as long as i got a story to tell
i will story tell my hell and why the fuck i fell
flat on my face, fuck it, i lost the race
i crossed the finish line last, i literally lost my face
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Re: crossed the line

Postby James R. » Feb 2nd, '09, 14:41

Good your practicing. This was ok, each section had it's own flow, but they looked separate to me so it didn't affect anything really. It's practice so I can't say much about pieces so short, but I would tell you to try to be a little more creative. Some of the lines were kinda corny and/or didn't make a TON of sense. Like the Godzilla line, it was ok, but it was a little cheesy especially since you're in Singapore lol. But also "fuck you like Godzilla" I mean I understand it's a super fuck, but you could have thought of something a little more creative I'm sure of it. Keep practicing man.
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Re: crossed the line

Postby gutawafang » Feb 2nd, '09, 14:45

alright!!! I'ma keep practicing man! Thanks a lot. I feel soooooo honoured to receive feeds from legends like u james! :happy:
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Re: crossed the line

Postby Slim Zaddy » Feb 2nd, '09, 14:49

actually as James said above , it's a good practicing ,, but i'm waiting for your creative drop .. i mean whole song .. so keep practicing as you can ,, and you're good in exposing your emotions ,, so keep it up bro .. :y: :y: :y:
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Re: crossed the line

Postby gutawafang » Feb 2nd, '09, 14:52

z_em wrote:actually as James said above , it's a good practicing ,, but i'm waiting for your creative drop .. i mean whole song .. so keep practicing as you can ,, and you're good in exposing your emotions ,, so keep it up bro .. :y: :y: :y:


hmmm. exposing my emotions? well, you're right man. i swear i'll keep practicing till i manage to drop a song. really, i will. :p

thanks z em!
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