Soldiers (Quick Drop)

[Slim Zaddy]

feedback is appreciated


Soldiers - When I say “breathless” what comes to mind,
Probably think of corpses produced by guns and knives,
Young lives extinguished with both a shudder and gasp,
Futures permanently closed off much like another past,
Sons leave mothers fast with eyes open in visceral shock,
Straining in last moments to act worthy of special ops,
After pistols cock or blades envelop hands with blood,
And recurring warnings are heard more than the Talmud,
What man can tell us the value found in our short years,
We never realize truth until the heavenly court appears,
To sort through arrears as faithful chest finally lies still,
From uninformed men who know no desire besides kill,
Lives spill in crimson tide as bodies are robbed of soul,
Tragedy strikes until customary making sobs perennial,
Petty gods control and deal out death whenever they like,
So watch out lest you become “breathless” with no life,

[neversnooze]

i liked the soldier theme in this piece. you described a soldier life with a nice flow and rhyme. i could see you continuing it. 9/10

[Slim Zaddy]

i liked the soldier theme in this piece. you described a soldier life with a nice flow and rhyme. i could see you continuing it. 9/10

nope bro it's only 1 verse , but i will make it complete .. so it would be on my mix tape.. and thanks for the feed bro .. i always appreciate yours..

[gutawafang]

That's so dope!

The first line already hooked me. And I want the whole song!

[Slim Zaddy]

That's so dope!

The first line already hooked me. And I want the whole song!

hahaha , glad you liked it bro . and thanks for checkin it out .. full thing is not done till know .. ,, but soon, it will be on my mix tape .. once i buy the recording tools..