i wrote this september 12, 2008 and have always wanted to record it but never got around to doing so. i want to get a couple other tracks layed down before i put this one down. no lyrical (aka Mc Anonish) shit just straight up feelings and pain writing that i decided to throw on here. i know i dont get on here a whole lot or feed everyones shit but its just a lil somethin, take a look and have a read if you wanna lol- lil jimmy.
copyright: lil jimmy leppek.
Artist: Lil' Jimmy
title: Dear Mama
Dear mama.
Please mama don’t cry,
Put the suicidal note away
Atleast you can say you try,
Maybe marijuana was a faze
And the vicadin was a habit, I got from you
Cuz Id go straight to the cabinet, when I snuck in your room
Mama, whats wrong? What are you stressin’ now?
I keep you in my blessins for protection, get off the ground
Don’t you know the stonger mother you are,
The stronger a man he will become?
Maybe me saying I hate you is unconditional love
Mama, uncover your ears it’s just me
Get out from behind those boxes, wipe your tears and see
Who your 2nd son has become, just to think
A product of you who wants to up and leave
But neither of us have parents, so we sit and weep
No motivation, so we creep
So lost in our heads, that every step is so steep
And because of you mama, I feel this weak
Dear mama im always shakin, im a nervous wreck
Reminiscin on the times Derek & I made you walkin mess
To the point youd blow up, hide, then resurrect
Ive seen you with that knive
Why do I wanna use that tek
You ask why I don’t talk, am I depressed?
My fuckin dad told me before he up & left
If mamas aint happy, nobodys happy. So what you expect
Between you and me – any minute could be my last breath
Your moods & ways are getting worse, everyday is a test
Its funny the way you and dale look @ eachother with regret
Two immature grown-ups that shouldve never met
And I don’t wanna fuckin look at you for leavin my pop for him
But you did what you had to for us, so I wanna forgive
But I dunno if I can mama, try to understand why
I hate the mother fucker too for leavin’ Derek & I to dry
No child support again, the years yall filled me wit lies
The tears I held back, just ballin inside
I know it aint easy for a woman to raise a man
But im losin’ my mind
Basically its come to this
used to watch my mom whoops my dads ass
cuz he aint bring the money home
so he'd sit and laugh
cuz he was so fucked up
used to tell me to goto my room and toughin up son
wondered why we cant be high class
till i realized neither of 'em went to class to pass
hated that man for years after he dipped
than that ladie helped me commit, so many sins, i split
i feel for him but ill forever remember the day he quit
son of bitch got cheated on
then mama raised 2 boys with her oven mits
it felt like it was just me and my little brother
we nothin but pissed off at the world trouble makers
how am i suppose to love woman
after what my mamas put me through?
how could i become a father
when i had no father figure to look to?
shit changes and life goes on
which explains why the seconds roll and imma ticking bomb
with what ive felt, im still learnin’ as the days pass
lil jimmy leppek, the only thing higher than him is the price of gas
mama, are you listenin?