JMG + SLMacDougall + James R + Spyder [Loved And Lost]

by **Le Tunisien** » Jul 24th, '09, 00:40

this was good,i enjoyed it :y:

record it^^! xD

by **Spyder** » Jul 24th, '09, 00:49

nice collabs guys :y:

i loved everyones verses

by **classthe_king** » Jul 24th, '09, 01:03

Wow, great verses. Was any of this true, if not great storytelling. Everyone shined but after reading them all Scottie stood out to me the most. A+ work.

by **MC Anonymous** » Jul 24th, '09, 01:11

SLMacDougall wrote:Spyder

Spyder a fighter to some, but a lover to another
my hearts a puzzle that only one can uncover.
Ive had tons of chicks in the past but shit didn’t last
all because of her I've givin up many women I could of had
but not all of its bad, late nights grabbin that ass
lappin it fast, I was gone, lost track and im back.
Its hard to leave when you built your life around em
takin pills for your feelings trying to drown them
its astounding, these bitches become snitches
as soon as you cant give 'em everything on their gift list
Keep wishing, chicks can be shifty you see…
can't keep an eye on 'em when you as busy as me
fucking with him, while i'm missing this trickery.
But forget bitches, now im all about rhyme n’ flow
Spit a line and go, remain ill is my m.o.
still cryin slow, though my heart broke along time ago.

....No. This was horrible Spyder... what the hell? You could have been way more eloquent with your word choices that you chose and you could have been way better with the message. This has no love at all just female derogatory statements. Multies were nice, flow was a lil off, message= horrible.
6/10

At this point I would have rather never loved at all
This is the type of shit that makes the thugs go soft
Lies, emotions, hearts getting tugged and tossed
I’ll never see why it’s better to have loved and lost

Chorus did it's job

James R

That fairytale shit is simply that, tales for the mystical
There was a point when I’d give the world just to sit with you
To get with you it took pride persistence and perseverance
I could feel that you were changing but it was worse to hear it
Admit your best wasn’t mine? I’d go deaf, dumb and blind
Before I accepted that your image was just left on my mind
But it wasn’t me I promise you that, it was you in every way
I never asked anything from you but that you’d never change
And you assured me it was the real you, shit you still do
Twist the real view and do it just to get dude’s to feel you
I can’t handle that someone I actually loved was fraudulent
Half is all I get? My heart fucking bleeds at the thought of it
My heart is on ball and chain, heart break chastity vest
Give 100 percent? No girl’s passing the test it has to be less
I’m demanding this testament to see what you fucking caused
Fuck that and fuck you fuck experiencing a love you lost

Excellent! Damn @ the fire in this verse, Nothing to fault, the emotion was vivid and so was the amount of wordplay/imagery you used. Great job James, 10/10.

At this point I would have rather never loved at all
This is the type of shit that makes the thugs go soft
Lies, emotions, hearts getting tugged and tossed
I’ll never see why it’s better to have loved and lost

SLMacDougall

you know that feeling when you feel like you'll always be alone .. ?
once had the greatest girl, and now she ent ever coming home ..
she won't even call me on the phone, it's like i was never even there
like i never existed, she was my best friend, now she doesn't even care
and man i'm gonna be honest, today when i opened up my wallet
i saw a picture of us together, and no one was around to give me any solace
and i don't know what to call it, but it feels like my heart is opening
is it really over now .. ? i can't sleep 'cause the memories are choking me
a heart never breaks even, it's like i'm in prison, and you're just running free
and no matter how hard i try to chase you, i can never get there, funnily -
other girls have been calling me, chatting me up, but i just ignore them see
coz honestly, they will never be what you was to me, and more importantly
they will never love me the way you did. can't you see how much i've cried .. ?
i can't cope with the amounts that you've lied, it's like i'm feeling rough inside
you just hung me up to dry, now all that's left is the red blood on my cross
i must have dissolved, 'cause i don't even exist since i LOVED then i LOST ...

Boring, I've heard this all before, the same song and dance. I didn't like the structure, was to stretched out and because of that the flow was off. Not enough internal rhymes to keep the transisitions to the next line smoothly, so it was choppy. The rhymes were basic, but it did it's job. Filled with rhymes you've already had in different context and connotation. I just didn't like it, still did better then Spyder.
7/10

At this point I would have rather never loved at all
This is the type of shit that makes the thugs go soft
Lies, emotions, hearts getting tugged and tossed
I’ll never see why it’s better to have loved and lost

All together an 7.5/10... Was good, but could have been way better. :y:

by **MC Anonymous** » Jul 24th, '09, 01:16

Btw I did a piece with the same exact title before you people did LOL

by **MC Anonymous** » Jul 24th, '09, 01:19

SLMacDougall wrote:
MC Anonymous wrote:Btw I did a piece with the same exact title before you people did LOL

i noticed it earlier, james came up with the name for this one, he did the hook too.

yours was a bit different though, said summin like love and loss, ours was in a different tense

Ye, you should go check it out, :y:

by **Spyder** » Jul 24th, '09, 01:25

MC Anonymous wrote:
SLMacDougall wrote:Spyder
....No. This was horrible Spyder... what the hell? You could have been way more eloquent with your word choices that you chose and you could have been way better with the message. This has no love at all just female derogatory statements. Multies were nice, flow was a lil off, message= horrible.
6/10

srry u didnt feel the message

by **JMG** » Jul 24th, '09, 01:29

sorry for being late, but i love this shit everyone came hard. nice hook 2.

by **James R.** » Jul 24th, '09, 02:26

Thanks for the feed peoples

by **gutawafang** » Jul 24th, '09, 02:27

Pretty good, as expected. :y:

by **James R.** » Jul 24th, '09, 02:30

Btw yes my verse was about a true story

by **JPearson** » Jul 24th, '09, 02:49

a song like this ain't meant to be about multis, complex flows and stuff, it should be simple flowing with meaningful lyrics jsut like this is.. we know these people can write about toher things with complexer flows and rhymes but they did a great job on this 2 :y: