Dear Silver,
You are the shit-throwing Juliet to my Romeo, the drug-abusing Thisbe to my Pyramus. If we were together, I would allow you to piss on my hairless asian chest, and perhaps even participate with you in the shit-throwing festivities which you so adore.
I adore you to this day, and I hope you know that.
To sum up my feelings in the words of acclaimed poet Ken Kaniff:
"Circle jerk....touch mah boday."
Sincerely, your biggest fan,
Snake