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ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

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ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

Postby Spyder » Jan 19th, '10, 02:46

Spyder
I along with these times have changed for the worse
The rhymes I disperse I simply cant explain in a verse
I pray but it hurts, I wanna uplift this unmerciful curse
Reverse the works, on the ground, Im not worth the dirt.
First at birth to my childhood I was calm and collected
All my thoughts respected now all of my jobs rejected
I cant except it, do all the work but get none of the credit
Its was fun but I let it hold this gun to my head and,
Now my backs against the wall and im aimin to fall
Now matter how many times I say it I aint changin at all.
All that I say to just stall, cant live without my medicine
Give me two tablets a new mattress, and back to bed again.
My heads spinnin, so I cant get a grip on my thoughts
All the shit that I lost has had me in submission so long
I don’t know who I am anymore, I gotta stay and relax
Cause I am what ive become and im not ever changin back.

Hook
I twisted and turned to get people to listen and learn
Changed my ways so I would get friends in return,
Im tired of shape shiftin to what you want me to be
Obviously im hidden, the real me I don’t wanna be seen.

McZu
Listen, I used to be cheerful, full with happiness when I met my peers too
Used to fear cool, ‘till I learned that being different is unclear due
...to having a different skin color I got dissed here too
I never wanted to differ from the others, that’s what I hear through
My past, now I would kill to keep my uniqueness when I tear through
The present, enrolling in uni clueless with every clue presented
Lost two friends, they’re never unmentioned, though motionless
So.. don’t ask, of course I seem emotionless when I’m in motion, yes
It’s that devotion to survive that made me worse over time
Over time you see that some friends don’t make it to over time
They’re just waiting to get you to do time, some never heard of a mime
Leaving you in open emotion stuck in a mine, he didn’t even mind..
This girl made me feel love for the first time, I mean real love
Til she took it away from me the same way she gave it to me, for real.. love
It seems surreal not real enough now, I’ve had enough, it’s clear enough
That I died in the past and came back with limited fear and love..

Hook
I twisted and turned to get people to listen and learn
Changed my ways so I would get friends in return,
Im tired of shape shiftin to what you want me to be
Obviously im hidden, the real me I don’t wanna be seen.

Edge
I used to be a real good kid, study hard and junk
Used to throw my baseball gear in the cars trunk
I would go and practice everyday, for hours at a time
I’d set my goals high, than the towers I would climb
Climb them to the top, climb until I had to drop
Get back up, my ambitions wouldn’t let me stop
I would listen to my mom and dad, make them glad
Wouldn’t do anything that I would take as bad
My head was in gear, was on the path for greatness
Id have a nice home, car, surely cash, id make it
Everything I thought was good, that I’d hear, id hold
Than I drank my fist beer, I was only fourteen years old
Two years go by, got my first real relationship
Next thing I know she’s laying naked saying strip
We were in the back of the local movie theater
Didn’t know what to do, than I felt me moving nearer
Now lets fast forward, I’m seventeen at a party
I drank a few beers, had a couple shots of Bacardi
I was drunk and my boy, approached me with a blunt
But was petrified of drugs, I still went out front
Told him I’d hit the blunt once, than never touch it
Another year later and now I just forever I love it
Guess this is just another story of a broken destiny
Who you kidding? You failed the same test as me
Last edited by Spyder on Jan 19th, '10, 16:07, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

Postby Edge » Jan 19th, '10, 09:25

nice colab guys :y:
be the best you can be, and if thats not good enough for people... than fuck em
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Re: ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

Postby mcZu » Jan 19th, '10, 22:52

Bump
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Re: ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

Postby Most-Hated » Jan 20th, '10, 03:41

Thought the first 2 verses were great, minus the hard-to-follow flow...

Spyder: You have a great rhyme scheme technique throughout, it seemed as if you were rapping along to a difficult beat and you looked to put a nice spin on your rhymes...
Maybe a little less slang type talk though (changin', aimin', spinnin') not that it's a bad thing but for some it may be hard to follow. In a song deffinetly try to spit it clear.

McZu: Your flow is somewhat hard to follow at first but i got into it, and really enjoyed the emotional tone, and the witty rhyming. Be sure to know what tone of voice to use if you ever record it. I would sugest a mono-type soft almost Mase type deal...but again thats just prefrence. Really enjoyed this verse man.

hook really needs some work though because it seems quickly throwed together. I sugest redoing it completely...

Edge you seem to be on the right track as in you know where your verse is going, but the rhyming needs heavy duty work. Things will come in time tho

Overall: 7.5/10 ...kind of played topic but the first 2 verses kept it interesting...nice job guys
she takes me on a journey, to a place called hell,
she showed where she stays, she show me where she dwells,
theres an errie saddness, commin from the room,
its as if its a funeral, but were all doomed,
death all around, but i feel more comfort,
blood rained skies, you could say im covered,
the feelin from her, is like no other
dont wanna say it, but the demon i love her
,
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Re: ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

Postby Spyder » Jan 20th, '10, 03:46

very interesting feed for a new guy :y:
thansk for the in depth feed bro, and i like to use "in" in stead of "ing" because it just sounds better imo

you may be scott...idk

your name is mysterious but i honestly dont know anymore

andhow thanks for the feedback bro :b:
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Re: ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

Postby Most-Hated » Jan 20th, '10, 03:52

Spyder wrote:very interesting feed for a new guy :y:
thansk for the in depth feed bro, and i like to use "in" in stead of "ing" because it just sounds better imo

you may be scott...idk

your name is mysterious but i honestly dont know anymore

andhow thanks for the feedback bro :b:

Don't you ever, ever, EVER mention me in the same sentence with a guy who wears more hair gell than Wayne Newton on a concert tour.

But your very welcome kind sir
she takes me on a journey, to a place called hell,
she showed where she stays, she show me where she dwells,
theres an errie saddness, commin from the room,
its as if its a funeral, but were all doomed,
death all around, but i feel more comfort,
blood rained skies, you could say im covered,
the feelin from her, is like no other
dont wanna say it, but the demon i love her
,
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Re: ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

Postby Spyder » Jan 20th, '10, 04:00

but you know of him...
sumin fishy is up :shifty:
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Re: ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

Postby gutawafang » Jan 20th, '10, 04:09

Spyder wrote:but you know of him...
sumin fishy is up :shifty:

:shifty: What? :shifty:

I like Edge's storyline the most.

The hook is pretty good.
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Re: ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

Postby Edge » Jan 20th, '10, 07:35

thanks for the feedback guys

and thanks fish :y:
be the best you can be, and if thats not good enough for people... than fuck em
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Re: ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

Postby Fa-Q » Jan 20th, '10, 08:05

Spyder...good multis and flow but the vocab wasn't all there...oh and good structure ima give you a 7.5/10


Zu...good stuff at times it was a bit hard to read but just cause you have a unique flow 7/10


Edge...come on man I've seen lightyears better than this from you...structure was there but that's about it...when you go up against these cats...you gotta bring your A-Game...I wish you could redo this verse cause I know you could kill this from what I've seen 5/10


Overall liked it espcially the hook...good job yall
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Re: ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

Postby Edge » Jan 20th, '10, 08:29

Fa-Q wrote:Spyder...good multis and flow but the vocab wasn't all there...oh and good structure ima give you a 7.5/10


Zu...good stuff at times it was a bit hard to read but just cause you have a unique flow 7/10


Edge...come on man I've seen lightyears better than this from you...structure was there but that's about it...when you go up against these cats...you gotta bring your A-Game...I wish you could redo this verse cause I know you could kill this from what I've seen 5/10


Overall liked it espcially the hook...good job yall


i was just worrying about stayin on topic and telling my story and my flow
be the best you can be, and if thats not good enough for people... than fuck em
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Re: ShapeShifter ft Zu and Edge

Postby Spyder » Jan 20th, '10, 18:16

thanks everyone :b:
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