Starring: Leonardo Dicaprio, Ellen Page, Marion Cotillard, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ken Watanabe
Director: Christopher Nolan
Release Date: 16th July 2010
othing else could have been number one, not after 2008, not after The Dark Knight. It. Was. Awesome. Due in no small part to the genius of Christopher Nolan, a director with an enviable track record, who now turns his attentions to the sci-fi genre with Inception, a movie shrouded in Cloverfield-levels of mystery.
We know Ken Watanabe is blackmailing Leonardo DiCaprio, who’s married to Marion Cotillard and works with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Ellen Page, but that’s it. Oh, and, it’s set within ‘the architecture of the mind’, which could mean anything at this point. Inception makes number one sheerly on the basis of the talent involved, the mega cast, the phenomenal director, and, again, because of 2008, which as our top two shows, was quite a good year for movies.
In the absence of promo images, we’ve amateurishly put together a poster ourselves for you viewing pleasure, it’s quite possibly 100% accurate, so beware SPOILERS BELOW!
2. Iron Man 2
Starring: Robert Downey Jr, Gwyneth Paltrow, Don Cheadle, Mickey Rourke, Scarlett Johansson
Director: Jon Favreau
Release Date: 7th May 2010
‘I am Iron Man.’ How could you not be desperate to see a sequel after Robert Downey Jr delivered that line at a press conference in the final scene of Iron Man? Like Tony Stark, director Jon Favreau has tinkered with his machine, upgraded it, and is ready to show the world Iron Man Mark II. In the superhero sequel tradition, it promises to be bigger and better, with the new friends, new foes and heightened fanboy expectations. Scarlett Johansson is Natasha Romanov – Tony Stark’s replacement red-head assistant now that Gwyneth Paltrow’s Pepper Potts has been promoted – she’s also secretly Russian superspy Black Widow. Mickey Rourke plays fellow Russian Whiplash, Iron Man’s nemesis along with Sam Rockwell’s Justin hammer. It appears as though The Iron Man armour has kick-started a new Cold War…
Terrence Howard is probably (like the rest of us) still in shock after getting Cheadled, and Olga Kurylenko can’t believe she didn’t get Johansson’s part. She refuses to take the costume off, it’s kind of embarrassing…
3. The Expendables
Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Jet Li, Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren, ‘Stone Cold’ Steve Austin, Mickey Rourke, Arnold Schwarzenegger
Director: Sylvester Stallone
Release Date: 13th August 2010
Sly Stallone wants to go out in a blaze of gory. Sorry, typo, blaze of glory. Actually, they’re both right. The Expendables could well be the throwback action movie that dreams are made of. With a cast list that reads like someone just reading names off of their action movie DVD collection, fans of the genre are getting spoilt rotten.
4.The Green Hornet
Starring: Seth Rogen, Cameron Diaz, Christoph Waltz, Edward Furlong
Director: Michel Gondry
Release Date: 22nd December 2010
The second nerd-friendly Seth Rogen entry on the list, but this one’s different. This is superhero Seth Rogen. The last time we saw Rogen kicking ass and taking names he wasn’t wearing a mask, he was high, and he was riding shotgun with Harry Osborn. Now he’s the one with the sidekick, and if what has been said up until now is true, The Green Hornet may be more lighthearted than some superhero fare, but it won’t be an out-and-out comedy.
The second nerd-friendly Seth Rogen entry on the list, but this one’s different. This is superhero Seth Rogen. The last time we saw Rogen kicking ass and taking names he wasn’t wearing a mask, he was high, and he was riding shotgun with Harry Osborn. Now he’s the one with the sidekick, and if what has been said up until now is true, The Green Hornet may be more lighthearted than some superhero fare, but it won’t be an out-and-out comedy.
5.Piranha 3D
Starring: Elisabeth Shue, Jerry O’Connell, Richard Dreyfuss, Ving Rhames
Director: Alexandre Aja
Release Date: 27th August 2010
Richard Dreyfuss thinks it’s safe to go back in the water – you think he’d know better. You know the deal: Remake. 3D. Sex, violence, comedy. Prehistoric piranhas tear to shreds every living thing in their path, mostly hot, young dumb actors, a couple of porn stars, and a couple of old intelligent actors for good measure. This isn’t high-brow, this is pure popcorn entertainment (although judging by the set pics, most of that popcorn will be regurgitated before you leave the theatre). Carnage!
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