Socialism: You have 2 cows. The state requires you to give 1 to your neighbor.
Communism: You have 2 cows. The state will take them out and gives you milk.
Fascism: You have 2 cows. The state will take them out and sell your milk.
Nazism: You have two cows. The government takes both and then shoots you.
Bureaucracy: You have 2 cows. The state will lose one, milk the other and then throws the milk.
Modern Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt / equity swap with associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax deduction for keeping five cows. The milk rights of six cows are transferred via a Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells the rights to all seven cows' milk back to the listed company. The annual report says that the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
Curiously throughout the process, nobody seems to realize that in reality, you only have 2 cows
Dictatorship: You have 2 cows, the government takes them. Without realizing it, they take you too.
Hinduism: You have 2 cows. They tell you what to do.
Pure Anarchy: You have 2 cows. You either sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors'll kill you to steal them.
Japanese Economy: You have 2 cows. You redesign them at 1:10 scale to produce twice as much milk. But you're not rich. You build a studio for making cartoons. Do a story about cows with super-powers, and inexplicably, you become a millionaire.
German economy: You have 2 cows. Through a process of reengineering you get them to live 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves. Nobody is believed to have any merit.
Russian Economy: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
China's economy You have 2 cows. You have 300 people milking them. You explain to the world your incredible ratio of milk production and disappear a journalist set out to tell the truth.
Iraqi Economy: You have no cows. Nobody believes that you have no cows, you got your country invaded and bombed
You still have no cows.
Swiss economy: There are 5,000,000,000 of cows. It is obvious that the cows have owners, but nobody seems to know who they are.
French Economy: You have 2 cows. Then you go on a strike and organize a violent riot because what you want are 3 cows.
Mexican Economy: You have 2 cows. One of them gets kidnapped, the other is seized by the army for alleged drug trafficking.
New Zealand economy: You have 2 cows. You find the left one more and more attractive every day.
I lmao'd
