"home is where the heart is" Previously lazy rap, now trying

by **GreenHatOrangeBill** » Jan 11th, '13, 03:33

my roommates a girl
a little world we share
she climbed in to my bed at night
i froze up then and there
we've never been this close
but i liked her all along
i'd make her raisin toast
and play her my new songs
as we turned to kiss
i needed to resist
we could mess this up
so it's cease and desist
that was a close call
the water broke my fall
i need to stay afloat
until i wash up on the shore
home is where the heart is
it's swaying in the hammock
vomit after meals
i think i'm bout to panic

LOF: viewtopic.php?f=24&t=149492

by **Just Silver** » Jan 11th, '13, 04:03

yep noob lol jk but you need a link of feedback i know its sorta gay but it helps everyone get a reply

by **Just Silver** » Jan 11th, '13, 04:15

Geno wrote:
Just Silver wrote:yep noob lol jk but you need a link of feedback i know its sorta gay but it helps everyone get a reply

It's not "gay". It makes perfect sense. How is anyone gonna improve without feedback? You won't. How will this section stay alive without posts? It won't.

It circulates feedback and activity.

i only said that cause for a long time that used to never be a requirement

by **GreenHatOrangeBill** » Jan 11th, '13, 04:19

oh alright, i'll go and give some feedback.
by the way, this was a stream of consciousness kind of thing and it seems silly now that i look back on what i wrote