I Broke Up With My Girl Today :/

[Slim Fiasco]

I'm so saddened and furious right now man, like the fuck happened earlier? You have this one moment when everything is OK and cool, and fun; and I was like, why don't you come to my place later? She said yes, and was real enthusiastic about it too, so it's all good to go. The time comes, she rings on the bell, we kiss, I welcome her in, and I'm thinking, this is going to be a real cool afternoon. 15 minutes in, she says "Could you please make me some coffee?", and I'm like, I don't drink coffee so you'll kinda have to make one yourself, because I'm not good at that kitchen ish. So she's there, and 3 minutes later I hear something like "damn". This immediately caught my attention, and I basically run to the kitchen. What I saw was just atrocious. While making the coffee, she had accidentally let it boil over or whatever, and there were like, well I don't know, 3-4 drips maybe that made it to the stove. She instantly cleaned it up, BUT, I cannot just forget that she made such a mistake. Like, I don't think if there's anything worse that she could've done. I repeat, she spilled 3 drops of coffee on the same stove where my Mom cooks food for me. The stove that keeps my stomach full! I don't know about you, but I couldn't take that shit, it was just too much for me, so I just told her that we had to break up, because I didn't know if I could trust her anymore. And like that, we ended it. Say what you want, but that's just how I am man, and if she's trying to change me, then does she really like me for who I am?

[HeySamantha]

You're early, it's not April Fools yet.

[LK5]

If you're not trolling, you're an asshole

[Almostlity]

[ImANoob]

obvious troll. tried to hard sonnnnn

[Slim Fiasco]

Haha, nah, guys, I actually was trying to be obvious and just make a joke. Shit is extremely funny if I tell it out loud with a serious tone. It's pretty much my version of this (Will Ferrell's part) - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s4wykeJBHdE

[HeySamantha]

If a woman doesn't know how to make coffee... Peace the fuck out.

To be fair, she'd have to be pretty fucking stupid and you would have left her before you got to the coffee part. Before I even started to drink coffee I knew how to make it lol

[HeySamantha]

Once I was at my buddies with a bunch of girls and guys, one of the girls asked the other girl to make some tea and her response was I don't know how to make tea

she should have been kick out of the house tbh

[AbramIsaac]

You left your girlfriend over coffee?

At least pick a good stimulant to get worked up about. Like meth. If a girl doesn't know how to turn a box of cold medicine into magical go-go powder without blowing up the trailer, then I don't want anything to do with her.

Probably mommy issues.

[Chet Starr]

I fucking love meth <3

if she fucks up meth, fuck her

[Guess_Who]

hahaha. I believed you untill i was in the middle of the story.

I'm mad , Slim Fi, now I want a coffee to forgive you.

[Slim Fiasco]

hahaha. I believed you untill i was in the middle of the story.

I'm mad , Slim Fi, now I want a coffee to forgive you.

Hahah, awesome! And I hope this girl I like will feel the same way. Though it's gonna be tough to set myself up to tell the story. But what's tougher is to keep a straight face, lol.

[Fleka]

Just call her, tell her how much you love her and that you can`t live without her. Take her out for dinner. You can do it man, I have faith in you.

[Slim Fiasco]

Just call her, tell her how much you love her and that you can`t live without her. Take her out for dinner. You can do it man, I have faith in you.

Only call she's gonna receive is the police saying: "We've found your parents in the woods, tied naked to a tree and stoned as a motherfucker."

[Sam.]

I'll talk her over. Link me up.