NEW - Lyrical Takeover (REVISING)

[Solace]

Anyone? Who thinks this would be a better verse 2?

Had losses, still losing and i take it like a man,
Ego tripping? No, I actually stay who I am,
Rhymes used to be oblique, now they're consistent,
Been beaten by bitches but I'm still persistent,
You're lyricism is distant, you have no kismet,
I'm twisting your rhymes so much they ain't existent,
The words coming out my mouth are deleterious,
"Please don't! I love you," here comes the kissing up,
My elocution of writing is quite exciting,
Won't be soon till you underground rappers biting.

[Ice_Scarred]

My rhymes are lines containing a disaster of spirits,
Emotional or funny, I'm still the master of lyrics.

My favorite lines. Great dude. Structure was nice, rhymes were killer. Keep it dope!

[Solace]

My rhymes are lines containing a disaster of spirits,
Emotional or funny, I'm still the master of lyrics.

My favorite lines. Great dude. Structure was nice, rhymes were killer. Keep it dope!

Thanks man, i really appreciate you checking it out

[Ka0t1c]

i think it's way too basic, it rhymes but horrible way to do it, freestylewise i could understand... this piece needs more thought put into it...

[Solace]

i think it's way too basic, it rhymes but horrible way to do it, freestylewise i could understand... this piece needs more thought put into it...

Thanks man, i appreciated you checking it and next time hopefully ill come up with something better