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Subliminal Inspiration (Feat McMaybe)

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Subliminal Inspiration (Feat McMaybe)

Postby Slim Zaddy » Jan 9th, '09, 21:29

need feedback on this guys and it will be much appreciated ..and i would like to thank McMaybe for writing for me the chorus ..

Verse 1

Shame is shown When A genius’ brain has to have some fault,
Pain in himself, a plague clouds over him, stolen from the vault?
Can’t even see the problem, can only feel the solemn ache inside?
An invisible enemy eating away at the inspiration that Resides,
In my thoughtful mind, Guess I wanted to show some compassion,
Evident In my passion of rap, talent is dished out small in rations,
& if A Poetical Genius has to go, God works in mysterious ways,
& I can’t help but be phased over what’s been shown on C.A.T displays,
I ain’t getting on my knee’s in this verse, far from that picture,
Just show my appreciation for a master of a metaphorical scripture,
Cos truthfully, His work made me smile, laugh & also Contemplate,
& even over my own work, I argued, but found A constructive debate,
I hope I don’t hear Of Skills Falling at this Unbearable Pain Hurdle,
Hope He surpasses the height & Finds That In fate He Learns To,
Appreciate what Life has too offer & shows His anguish On the page,
& I hope James pieces will continue to fuel my Skills, Love & Rage,
Cos I read What I feel, & when I read The meanings, I’ll feel that way,
& if A fellow writer is taken away…They’ll be continue is dismay,

chorus ( x2) (written by McMaybe)

H: Haters hate and make me better with time...
A: After all, I settle vendettas with rhymes...
T: Taking over what I thought I could see...
E: Every person that I wanted to be...
I hate now!
E: Every person that had a doubt... Doubt...
T: Take the worst of me and let it out... Out...
A: After all I'm just a human being... Being...
H: Hating what you wouldn't see... see...


verse 2

Came in December from what I remember, a member,
That shone straight from the start with the strength of ember,
Star lighted topicals from the beginning. picturing war,
You didn’t just visuals the writing but the images you saw,
because he threw Open Mics raw..opened a door for all,
Putting yet more bricks back up for the crumbling RB wall,
But this aint a d/r call.. Me & haters didnt used to see eye to eye,
We had a argue & a cry but grown mutual in the blink of an eye.
With material never dry, they gained my attention which is rare,
Made a lil something outta nothing..even if it wasn't there.
At first I didnt care, just thought they were another hypochondriac,
Then I thought to myself..no ones sick enough to make deem facts.
So with a backed down attack. .I hope this verse is a pace-setter,
& with my deepest thought, I hope McMaybe gets sicker,

chorus ( x2) (written by McMaybe)

H: Haters hate and make me better with time...
A: After all, I settle vendettas with rhymes...
T: Taking over what I thought I could see...
E: Every person that I wanted to be...
I hate now!
E: Every person that had a doubt... Doubt...
T: Take the worst of me and let it out... Out...
A: After all I'm just a human being... Being...
H: Hating what you wouldn't see... see...


verse 3

I Envy Those Beings, Who Are Naturally Gifted,
There Supernatural Aspects, Are Spiritually Lifted,
Seems There Invincible, Their Armor Is Flawless,
Lives Are Intact, Don't See The Oncoming Mess,
Than All Of A Sudden, No Warning Or Explanation,
Life Takes A Turn, No Light, Just Devastation,
Defenses Are Weakened, Their Internals Visible,
Nothing Held Back, Now The Guts Just Spill,
How Something So Bad, Effected Your Life Forever,
The Symptoms Minimal, Your Still So Clever,
Fighting So Hard, With Ya Head On Backwards,
Living Inside Adversity, Just Can't Find The Words,
Did You Ever Imagine, Such A Different Struggle,
A Wave Of Emotion, So Hard, Yet So Subtle,
Hope You Rid Your Body Of This Horrible Poison,
Come Back Dope, Ready To Take Action it’s Z here wit boyson,

chorus ( x2) (written by McMaybe)

H: Haters hate and make me better with time...
A: After all, I settle vendettas with rhymes...
T: Taking over what I thought I could see...
E: Every person that I wanted to be...
I hate now!
E: Every person that had a doubt... Doubt...
T: Take the worst of me and let it out... Out...
A: After all I'm just a human being... Being...
H: Hating what you wouldn't see... see...

:smoking: :smoking:
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Re: Subliminal Inspiration (Feat McMaybe)

Postby Slim Zaddy » Jan 10th, '09, 12:30

3o peopel reads this , and not a single feedback.. :whistle:
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Re: Subliminal Inspiration (Feat McMaybe)

Postby Robbie G » Jan 10th, '09, 18:54

I thought it was pretty good.

The chorus was neat with it spelling 'hate'.
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Re: Subliminal Inspiration (Feat McMaybe)

Postby Ice_Scarred » Jan 11th, '09, 04:20

Pretty good guys. Keep on busting your balls on your lyrics, and one day you'll be sick as fuck! lol XD jk
Nah, it was really good. Structure was good, flow was decent, nice hook, good feature, it overall was a great drop. 8.5/10!
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Re: Subliminal Inspiration (Feat McMaybe)

Postby Solace » Jan 12th, '09, 00:10

Wow that was really great! Im sorry i missed out on this, guess i didnt notice it. You, z_em, had great verses. I thought 1 & 2 were quite good but verse 3 was lacking. And Maybe's chorus was nice, i liked how it spelled Hate, then Hate backwards. Good job both of you! :y:
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Re: Subliminal Inspiration (Feat McMaybe)

Postby Slim Zaddy » Jan 13th, '09, 08:41

Epiphany wrote:Wow that was really great! Im sorry i missed out on this, guess i didnt notice it. You, z_em, had great verses. I thought 1 & 2 were quite good but verse 3 was lacking. And Maybe's chorus was nice, i liked how it spelled Hate, then Hate backwards. Good job both of you! :y:


thanks man for the feed , really apprecitaed bro . :D ,, i did'nt see you writing from a long time .. so commin man don't be lazy ,, come up wit something ,,

Pretty good guys. Keep on busting your balls on your lyrics, and one day you'll be sick as fuck! lol XD jk
Nah, it was really good. Structure was good, flow was decent, nice hook, good feature, it overall was a great drop. 8.5/10!


thanks man ,,, really appreciate that .... glad you liked it . :happy:

I thought it was pretty good.

The chorus was neat with it spelling 'hate'.


thanks man glad you liked it
Last edited by Slim Zaddy on Jan 13th, '09, 12:15, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Subliminal Inspiration (Feat McMaybe)

Postby SajN » Jan 13th, '09, 11:05

Nice job.

Very clever verses, they're sick. And chorus is great :y:
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Re: Subliminal Inspiration (Feat McMaybe)

Postby Arabian Shady » Jan 13th, '09, 12:30

i think its wiked your onto complete songs with a chorus, rhymes were sick, best part was flow, cause they did so effortlessly
wiked bro
Maybe did a good 1 for the chorus :y:
ArAbIaN ShAdY


We're all on the same page, Yet we're standing apart on different lines'
So when we face rage, Ya'll fake it and let THEM commit horrific crimes
50 years & going straight, Yet this performance aint worth your time,OUR
Shit is BACKSTAGE,Cause the front page aint worth Kashmir and Palestine.
"Front Page",Arabian Shady


FiNd mE At dA "CREATIVE SECTION", I AM ULTIMATE INNOVATION!!
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Re: Subliminal Inspiration (Feat McMaybe)

Postby Slim Zaddy » Jan 17th, '09, 16:47

thanks for both of ya guys , much appreciated :worship:,,

more feedback would be appreciated ..
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Re: Subliminal Inspiration (Feat McMaybe)

Postby TheWeirdoIsBack » Jan 19th, '09, 00:56

Was a nice read, I was entertained the whole way through. The vocab was great, the flow was on-point most of the time, and McMaybe offered a great hook. Keep it up bro :y:
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Re: Subliminal Inspiration (Feat McMaybe)

Postby Slim Zaddy » Jan 19th, '09, 21:13

TheWeirdoIsBack wrote:Was a nice read, I was entertained the whole way through. The vocab was great, the flow was on-point most of the time, and McMaybe offered a great hook. Keep it up bro :y:



thanks man glad you liked it .. and ya McMaybe chorus .. is sick.. thanks again for checkin it out .. :)
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