NEW - Spilling It

[Solace]

[Verse 1]
Getting angered every moment, sweating at night,
School is like being in a coma, I can't put up a fight,
I'm weak but I'll try, spit my shit, swallow my sorrow,
Be thanking my lord if I can get through today by tomorrow,
And y'all joke, y'all smirk, I can't get enough of it,
Love seeing you fake bastards acting all tough and shit,
You're disgusting, the way you act makes me gag,
You pussies would cry if you were shot by a blank,
Got money in the bank? You aint even got change,
And fuck you, no one gives a fuck about my age.

[Chorus]
It's how I feel, you don't like it? I don't a give a fuck,
My sadness, my anger, it's like having a million cuts,
Internal bleeding, but I feel fucking healthy,
You think I need some help? Then why don't you help me?
My cussing, my whining, it's my expression,
I'm running out of breath and I can't comprehend this.

[Verse 2]
I'll say what the fuck I want, however I want to,
Speak like a Muslim, and then come to bomb you,
God was probably smashed when he created me,
Got lazy, drank more scotch and then he made me,
Grew up with a dead beat father, well fuck him,
I used to pretend I liked him, but i felt nothing,
Alone in my room, age 7 listening to The MMLP,
Grew on me as did rap, my loneliness was melting,
Writing bars last year, grade 7, its all i need,
Cause who even wants to help me, a growing fiend?
Life disgusts me, and all I ever wanted,
Was a simple life, never taunted, never haunted.

[Chorus]

[James R.]

I like it so far. You seem a little pissed lol. I'd cut the last line from the chorus because it throws off the flow. You don't need a 7 or 8 bar chorus. It's just too long. I like it a lot with just the first 6. Emotion makes this. Nothing I haven't seen you do before skill-wise, but the fact that I can tell that you're pissed makes it better.

[Requiem]

THAT WAS UR BEST ONE YET!!!!!

great job man, the rhymes weren't super complicated but the flow was perfect, and it had such a natural strong impact. i fuckin loved it! and i don't cuss. hell of a job
THIS IS UR NEXT RECORDED SONG DAMMIT!!!! i'm gonna make a sick ass beat for it.

i cussed the most in my life thx to this, damn....

[Solace]

I like it so far. You seem a little pissed lol. I'd cut the last line from the chorus because it throws off the flow. You don't need a 7 or 8 bar chorus. It's just too long. I like it a lot with just the first 6. Emotion makes this. Nothing I haven't seen you do before skill-wise, but the fact that I can tell that you're pissed makes it better.

thanks man, im kinda throwing shit back thats been thrown at me. ill edit the chorus, i guess your right. Again, thanks for checking it.

THAT WAS UR BEST ONE YET!!!!!

great job man, the rhymes weren't super complicated but the flow was perfect, and it had such a natural strong impact. i fuckin loved it! and i don't cuss. hell of a job
THIS IS UR NEXT RECORDED SONG DAMMIT!!!! i'm gonna make a sick ass beat for it.

i cussed the most in my life thx to this, damn....

Thanks man, depends if it turns out good (the 2nd verse). Glad you liked it! Get your ass on msn btw

[Requiem]

^i like it man (verse 2). but it needs some revising

u need an "i" between fuck and want.
change "an" to "a"
i think "drank some scotch" would sound better
delete "well"
i think "i use to pretend to like him" sounds somewhat better

and u could do something like "It grew on me.... as did rap,"
and after that it needs to be changed. didn't like how it ended.

lmao, i feel like a prick. but i can still feel the anger, and emotion. which is good. a little revising and this it will be primed for u to record it

[Solace]

^i like it man (verse 2). but it needs some revising

u need an "i" between fuck and want.
change "an" to "a"
i think "drank some scotch" would sound better
delete "well"
i think "i use to pretend to like him" sounds somewhat better

and u could do something like "It grew on me.... as did rap,"
and after that it needs to be changed. didn't like how it ended.

lmao, i feel like a prick. but i can still feel the anger, and emotion. which is good. a little revising and this it will be primed for u to record it

Thanks man, i fixed the errors (cept i kept "well" and "drank more scotch" cause im saying the god had already drank scotch and then he drinks more...And "it grew on me....as did rap" would ruin the flow imo.)

About the last 2 lines, ill try changing them

nice, i enjoyed it. fuck, you all write alot more than me lol.
i'm busy taking pics

thanks man
and dont worry, your pictures are awesome