Without You

[Emadyville]

This I wrote for a girl, the beat already has a hook in it, and I basically spilled my guts on this track, just curious if you think it's good. And the beat is slow, I wrote this to it, so it does flow haha so don't worry about that. Thanks for reading and all feed is appreciated.

If you knew how many times I put the pen to the page,
To a beat like this, but then again it fades,
I had at least seven songs that were just like this,
But I can't hold it back and now as I write this,
I realize it had to come out, no more concealing,
Two of your friends asked me, about my feelings,
For you, and when they did, I tried to lie,
But when they did I smiled, I could not hide,
The one thing you were always able to make me,
And in this life I lead it is what I need to make me,
I feel with that smile somehow you take me,
Away from reality it's like no one can break me,
I feel so alive and I know it sounds crazy,
But crazy feels right and I don't know but maybe,
You feel the same way I never manned up to ask,
I just hope the feelings that you once had are back...

I never thought I'd show so much emotion but lately,
When I sit down to write, you're all that makes me,
And you're the only one who can break me down, it's crazy,
I never thought one person would be able to phase me,
As much as you, so what to do, where can I turn,
The same place as always, my life's in these words,
I say I fight them as I continue to write them,
If it's the wrong way I don't know how to be right then,
I guess maybe I'm scared, to tell you what's on my mind,
Or if I show you how I feel that I'd be out of line,
I guess my chances to do so are past and fell through,
Or maybe I just can't think of better way to tell you,
You can tell I'm a little lost, well to say the least,
You know I'd never lie to you, this is me being me,
So when this songs over please let me know you heard it,
I guess in my mind somehow, I feel that's perfect...

I should have talked to you, instead of a song,
But it's all I know, it's where I feel strong,
I think I say it better here then I could in person,
And if this was wrong I can't really feel worse than,
I feel right now as I write between the lines,
Now it's off my chest and tomorrow I'm fine,
But I hope you get at me, I honestly do,
I meant every single word and I will promise you,
Everything and more these words could never describe,
And I'm sorry it's just when we're together I'm shy,
So listen closely to the first line of what she says,
Cause if you don't feel the same way that's me until the end...

(before the hook after ^ she says "I never want to see you unhappy")

[SajN]

What I think is that the first verse started off good, but then it went a little downhill.
And the 2nd verse and 3rd verse were good to, but not not better than the 1st verse's start.

But a nice emotional piece

Wanna check out mine please?

[Emadyville]

What I think is that the first verse started off good, but then it went a little downhill.
And the 2nd verse and 3rd verse were good to, but not not better than the 1st verse's start.

But a nice emotional piece

Wanna check out mine please?

Yeah I will thanks for feeding, idk it's like I had so much to say but didn't know how to say it I guess, girls man it's what they do to us!!