Murder Murder

[Cookzee]

people lable me as crazy
deranged and so maybe
he'll snap and grab the gat
aim at his own face he
is a danger, nobody on earth could predict
if his lyrics are a sign
as to what this kid is
it's so outta this box
so offa this wall
human sacrifaces, well i'm sacrificing em all
fuck a pad i just write on the wall
blood in the cor-ner
all the way to the motherfucking haulaway door
up in the hallway you saw
a saw for cuttin you up
i don't do guns!
i love the feeling when im covered in blood
im on a buzz, it isn't drugs that's fucking me up
i thing im bugging, did my mother really smother her son? (bitch imma kill you haha)


havn't been doing this long so constructive, as always thanks

[Emadyville]

sounds like 3 am

[Cookzee]

urrmmm yeah i can see the resemblence but just because it's got murder in it you can't really relate it to 3 am, i see this a lot on this forum now, since relapse came out everyone started youthimising other peoples songs and relating them to shady's, i do see ur point but like i said, hundreds upon hundreds of verses were written based on murder before shady even heard the beat of 3 am

not having a go though, but try and tell me if it's good rather than what it sounds like

[Cookzee]

bump

[Just Silver]

like the concept and short bars but should be a little more complex try using some larger vocabulary (not to be a dick just helping) other than that 'Spottin'

[gutawafang]

ha. yeah, it does sound like 3AM. It's cool though. Nice drop.

[Cookzee]

any more?