Ink of the Mind (Nirvana) - Relapse & Spyder

[Relapse.LP]

[Verse 1 - Relapse]
Technique blossoms, unique physique modern, all these critiques' rotten
Sin like antique Sodom; dickride excessively so they use oblique condoms
Mystique forgotten; intermission to remind of my ambition of the mind
Tradition of my kind to mercilessly disintegrate opposition from behind
Definition of these rhymes? The time and place where divinity lives in hell
Got an affinity for a cell, lyricism infinity and excel, vicinity is farewell
Duo with Spyder: not a trinity that can't spell; et cetera. eternal crown
Infernal sound, fiery words; this external pound makes your internals drown
My journals confound, blood-stained pages, your gut-pains drained ya
Just remain ageless, exponentially take it to the next level when I gain stages
Release the constrained ages, maturity builds, your self-security's killed
Purity's spilled like Pandora's Jar: your secret's out, the obscurity's filled
No need for rehearsing skills, "reversing thrills" like amusement park rides
Feuding sparks replies; topple democracy to show TR's students' dark sides
These secluded "sharks" "bite"; anger the Gods and we'll slaughter Titan Atlas
Apocalypse begins; "At World's End", Spy and Lapse father the tightest classics

[Hook X2]
Shadow of a smile, eyes closed, trying to think of a rhyme...
No need for pen or paper when writing with ink of the mind...

[Verse 2 - Spyder]
My lyrical talent a miracle to challenge, my testaments right
This skill like a ‘life investment’ endin yours so invest in your life
Aristocrat spittin gats, aint even gettin your weapons all right
Battle if you steppin lets fights, my spit like holy water blessin the mic.
Rap disciple, the crowd found I crash the vinyl
Now you down, bound with Relapse crackin spinals.
My words hit, absurd shit, pin point when im startin the track
My brain racin when that needle drop and became sharp as a tack.
Carnage in fact, the Spyder at an alarmin rate your dead
Fuck fists I conversate instead, dont you know I dominate the web?
I Even the odds its science like the Atoms/Adams im splittin apart
Rippin individuals hearts from the fuckin minute it starts.
Intricate bars got you kissin the tar, im just new to the fame
Pop Caps, Pull and Cock back to put Macs into shame.
Never tried suicide… though I heard the Bullet bites
I just might pull it right, as Le Tunisien fakes to write.

Line 8+9 – pin point, needle, sharp as a tack…you get it
Line 10+11 – Carnage goes with Spiderman…Spyder,
Dominate the Web… internet and spiderweb. & Adam and Eve
Line 14 – PC and Macs, also dissin Macdaddy
Line 15+16 – yes those are disses to Tuni and Bullet Boy
biting lyrics is the reason btw. Hence Bullet bites

[Hook X2]
Shadow of a smile, eyes closed, trying to think of a rhyme...
No need for pen or paper when writing with ink of the mind...

[BILI]

It was pretty good,I liked both verses,but that hook coulda be bigger

[Emadyville]

Bot hverses were dope, vocabs real nice on both, word up

[Spyder]

thanks for the feedback guys
LP you verse was crazy as fuck

in detail feed would be loved

[Relapse.LP]

Thanks for feedback. Keep 'em coming.

EDIT: I agree with Spyder: detailed feedback would be appreciated.

[Relapse.LP]

Bump.

[Spyder]

stop sleepin mother fuckers and feed

[Nimbus_9]

cool

[Spyder]

oh thanks for that in detail feed

[Relapse.LP]

Bump... Most slept on collabo.

[Wic Kid]

Eventhough you guys have completely different styles IMO, this actually turned out great. Relapse's multies were...wow. And his vocab was far more complexed. But the again, I could flow Spyders verse in the first reading. To be honest, I like Spyders verse little more, cuz it flowed better and also had lotta good multies and great rhyme structure. No hard feelings, Lapse . Hook was pretty well done. Simple and short, yet tells a lot.
I thought that last line of Spyders about Tuna was hilarious. Awesome way to end your verse. But my favorite part of the song was the very beginnin of it, Relapse's first two lines.

Technique blossoms, unique physique modern, all these critiques' rotten
Sin like antique Sodom; dickride excessively so they use oblique condoms

Brilliant.

[Relapse.LP]

Eventhough you guys have completely different styles IMO, this actually turned out great. Relapse's multies were...wow. And his vocab was far more complexed. But the again, I could flow Spyders verse in the first reading. To be honest, I like Spyders verse little more, cuz it flowed better and also had lotta good multies and great rhyme structure. No hard feelings, Lapse . Hook was pretty well done. Simple and short, yet tells a lot.
I thought that last line of Spyders about Tuna was hilarious. Awesome way to end your verse. But my favorite part of the song was the very beginnin of it, Relapse's first two lines.

Technique blossoms, unique physique modern, all these critiques' rotten
Sin like antique Sodom; dickride excessively so they use oblique condoms

Brilliant.

Thanks man.

Feedback means a lot and you're one of the few here who actually give feedback. Genuine descriptions and criticism.

[Spyder]

thank you Wic Kid
everyone learn from him

[DƎRDYPK]

Mc Anonymous told me to leave feed on this for him
he said

Relapse; The verse had a very hard and rough flow to it, which made it almost impossible to rap to a beat unless you not double, but TRIPLE the original pace that the beat goes. The multies were dope, however when the multies make it impossible to flow due to syllable count, you need to re-think the way you write your bars. Some of the multies seemed forced, but the overall way it was made was ok.

Spyder; It's boring, there's nothing that made me think otherwise. The multies were typical of you and it seems you have lost the sense of versatility in your verses. Flow was really good, I enjoyed the flow immensly. The personals to bullet boy and tunisien was good. Some of the wordplay was forced also

[Relapse.LP]

Cool, props for feedback, Anon.