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First Rap on Trshady

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First Rap on Trshady

Postby GhanjaGod24 » Jan 7th, '10, 21:13

If I had to tell you where it all started
probably couldn't, cause I'm mentally retarded.
Smoke so much pot, my fuckin brains fried
Keep choking on my own words
This rap shits got me tongue tied.

Same bullshit, just a different day
Waking up in SI, all shades of grey.
This place is a fucking jail cell
Get me outta here
Poppin pills in this hell
Smoking blunts to relieve fear.

Got to leave you now, I know its the begining
Bad things to do, got to keep on sinning.
It's only my first rap
Hope it sounds ok
If it sounds like crap
Think of something better to say.
"Side effects is similar to sugar pill
Who eva go next on the mic, he put a booger ew
And mad his exit on some calm shit
Begged em' on the regular for kegs of more Vomitspit."
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Re: First Rap on Trshady

Postby Spyder » Jan 7th, '10, 21:51

go in the Rap Battle section where it says Guidelines or something
and learn what a multi is :y: not being a dick just saying

your didnt have multies, was very very very basic rhyming
i didnt feel any emotion behind the peice, and the flow was off
the structure and rhyme shceme were bad...

that being said, its your first rap. so make sure to check out how other people do it
without taking their style or biting their lyrics. check the section i told you above
to improve structure,multies vobab complexity and all that
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Re: First Rap on Trshady

Postby shadyfreakzul » Jan 7th, '10, 21:53

cool stuff.am new here can we battle?
I'm strong, my word is Bond like James
Niggaz be tryin to test, but they 'week' like seven days-Canibus

I don't belong here,my dad fucked my mom in the wrong year.-Budden

like taekwondo you lack punches-Shadyfreakzul

Around here i am the Goat like the Capricorn.-Wale
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Re: First Rap on Trshady

Postby Spyder » Jan 7th, '10, 21:57

shadyfreakzul wrote:cool stuff.am new here can we battle?


you beg for a battle one more time im gonna warn you
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Re: First Rap on Trshady

Postby BILI » Jan 7th, '10, 21:58

Lmao @ that dude askin for battle in every thread
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Re: First Rap on Trshady

Postby Spyder » Jan 7th, '10, 22:03

i know, ive had about a nuff :shakehead: :coffee:
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Re: First Rap on Trshady

Postby Element. » Jan 7th, '10, 23:24

Lol
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Re: First Rap on Trshady

Postby GhanjaGod24 » Jan 7th, '10, 23:34

Thanks for the advice :y: , Edge told me about that multi shit to
I'll get it eventually lol :8)
"Side effects is similar to sugar pill
Who eva go next on the mic, he put a booger ew
And mad his exit on some calm shit
Begged em' on the regular for kegs of more Vomitspit."
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Re: First Rap on Trshady

Postby Spyder » Jan 7th, '10, 23:39

Smithy wrote:Lol


what you laughing about smithy :laughing:
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Re: First Rap on Trshady

Postby Element. » Jan 7th, '10, 23:55

Spyder wrote:
Smithy wrote:Lol


what you laughing about smithy :laughing:


Laughin at shady beggin for battles lol
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Re: First Rap on Trshady

Postby Edge » Jan 8th, '10, 00:00

GhanjaGod24 wrote:Thanks for the advice :y: , Edge told me about that multi shit to
I'll get it eventually lol :8)


:8)
be the best you can be, and if thats not good enough for people... than fuck em
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Re: First Rap on Trshady

Postby BILI » Jan 8th, '10, 00:02

Smithy wrote:
Spyder wrote:
Smithy wrote:Lol


what you laughing about smithy :laughing:


Laughin at shady beggin for battles lol

You was just like that when you came here
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Re: First Rap on Trshady

Postby Element. » Jan 8th, '10, 00:13

^

No i was not begging for battles, i knew where to go.
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